84 The Communication Process

Fights at home?
No progress at work?
Things just not going right for you?
Unless really desperate, we ignore communications that can change us.
Effective Communications is a process that goes beyond # 4:

1. Ritual acknowledgment.
   Basically ‘ignoring’ whatever they say …in a socially polite way!
   
2. Refuse to listen.
   Far advanced because it allows that there’s actually something there to refuse.
   
3. Mis-interpret to sender’s detriment.
   Senders tend to give up when this happens: “Aw, just forget it!”
   
4. Massage information to mitigate input.
   Bring in all sorts of counterpoints to explain-away rather than deal-with.
   
5. Accept input intellectually.
   “Doesn’t apply to me, of course, but I see what you’re saying. Interesting.”
   
6. Try input on for size.
   If I were that way, let me see, that would mean I often am /do thus and so. etc.
   
7. Adjust thinking to incorporate communication. SUCCESS!!
   
8. Use in all future things: The new me.

Fights at home?
No progress at work?
Things just not going right for you?

Accelerate the process: Choose any one thing you have trouble with.
When someone tells you (or you tell yourself!) what’s wrong…
Determine where you are in the Process.
Check the next step because that’s where you’re stuck.
Then ‘conscious’ your way through that step.

Don’t stop there! Take the next step.

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These are related:

10 Progress It – 11 Feedback – 12 Change – 27 Responses – 43 Desire

52 Correct Decisions – 57 Helicopter – 67 Personal Nag – 69 Labels

70 Conclusions – 83 Being Wrong – 95 Ring/Knock – 103 Ring/Knock Part 2